Cooking Things: November 2009 Archives

It rained and rained today, after a Friday so blustery that I had to leap off my bike to avoid being knocked down by the wind.

I'm pretty experienced at riding in bad weather, so that emergency-maneuver moment came as something of a surprise. I'm guessing that gust was 60mph or higher. It's been a weird few days, and I am spinning a little in place, not sure which direction to move.

I had a silly revelation in which I realized that what I'd thought was me having lost my magic touch with bread dough was in fact simply ill-placed frugality. I was stubbornly trying to use up the last of a few packets of expired yeast. They weren't terribly long-expired - just a couple of months, but apparently it does make a difference.

This time around I immediately felt the yeast lively and springing under my hands as I began to knead. No elaborate coaxing necessary. The final product is light and delicate and moist and chewy and delightful. Only six ingredients: flour, water, yeast, molasses, salt, canola oil. Seven if you count the fact that the flour was two different kinds - whole wheat and white hard-wheat (bread-specific). I used a larger ratio of whole wheat to white, because I wanted it to pretty much be whole wheat bread.

I brought some to a dinner party and froze one and kept one out, wrapped up, to be eaten in the next couple of days.

I dunno what to say in the boy department. I feel like it's almost time to meet someone. Someone a bit more than the casual-friend-lover hybrid(s) I've been fooling about with for the last year.

But I can't say I'm especially sanguine about the prospects. I just don't meet people all that often or easily, and I have a lot of requirements. Which is funny, given how much I've teased other people about that very thing - "Your list is too long to be realistic."

My requirements, in order of non-negotiability, are:

non-smoker
not addicted to alcohol or drugs
cyclist
attractive (to me)

I guess that's it, but the last item on the list encompasses a wide range of subcategories. I mean, I'm not attracted to men who are significantly less intelligent than me - unless I'm using them for sex, in which case, Whatever.

They kind of have to have a decent sense of humor, and by that I mean that they have to have some measure of original wit and also to think I'm damn funny when I'm being damn funny.

They can't be a macho chauvinist pig.

They have to think I'm da bomb.

They have to be damn good in bed.

They have to smell right and/or taste right.

They can't live in New Jersey. They can't be domineering. They can't be married or have kids. They can't take the subway. (I'm sorry; that just grosses the shit out of me.) They can't be pining for a high-heels, ponytail sort of girl. I'd prefer that they weren't rampant carnivores, since it makes it hard to agree on restaurants, though that one isn't a deal breaker. It would be really, really nice if they wanted to dance with me sometimes. It would be nice if they had actual hair on their head. It would be nice if they were handsome in an un-mainstream, un-GQ sort of way. A little exotic or a little quirky (or both) is fine. Awesome, actually.

Know anyone?